Helen Bauer - Grand Supreme Darling Princess

Helen Bauer is unabashedly one-of-a-kind; originally from Fleet, Northeast Hampshire, UK, as place she happily boasts about with its one petrol station and drab emptiness. I her early thirties, she is hitting the Australian comedy festival circuit for the first time with her in-your-face stand up shows including a double act with fellow comedian Catherine Bohart in Trusty Hogs.

She is hilarious, defiant, and a real tour-de-force. Since debuting in August 2019 at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, she has since made a bunch of TV appearances across Britain. Loud and vivaciously huge and cute, Bauer jumps out on stage from behind the curtain and tells us in a loud gruff voice that she is the big English girl. And “You don’t need to tell me l am fat (pause) l do have a mother”.  She is a natural talent, appears improvised, yet provides a well-rehearsed repertoire. Bauer is no wuss; she is fast and strong.

Her family are the brunt of her many jokes, and she balks at the mother and daughter relationship as an unhealthy friendship. She feels the same about striking up with “empaths”. They grate her nerves. Bauer plays on the unlikable female stereotype, the girl that never had a boyfriend perpetually single and likes it like that, while happily boasting of her sexual conquests. She is the antithesis of your average self-deprecating stand-up comedian.

When discussing her bucket list of dreams with her therapist, she heeds the advice and jumps on a plane to Los Angeles and heads straight to Disneyland, where she discovers the fat Disney channel, which informs fat people about rides that will fit their girth. She morphs into many characters and stays fast with punchlines.  With her amazing flexible voice range, she should be doing voice over for Disney. Put that on your bucket list Helen Bauer!

Helen Bauer is a refreshing, shining new British talent, and a huge barrel of laughs.

Flora Georgiou

Photographer: Raphael Neal.